An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out. (George Jean Nathan, american critic)

Do not on any account attempt to write on both sides of the paper at once.” (W. C. Sellar, english humorist)

“What a lucky thing the wheel was invented before the automobile: otherwise can you imagine the awful screeching?”
(Samuel Hoffenstein, american writer, poet)

“I’m not a fighter, I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by two guys.” (Woody Allen, american writer)

“I don’t know why it is that we’re in such a hurry to get up when we fall down. You might think we would lie there and rest awhile.” (Max Eastman, american writer)

From: “Stop the World! I Want to Get Off.”
Edited and translated by Gábor Salamon, Melinda Zalotay, 1990